Here's a little image for you! You had a bad day. You come home to lean on your significant other only to feel worse. It's as if they aren't listening to a single word you are saying.
That really puts a damper on the relationship! Who's going to want to get down and romantic after that?
But here is a question to ponder...
Who's fault is it?
You as the communicator or them as the listener?
Let's say were are talking about a Male/Female relationship here. We all know that these two sexes are on a different planet at the best of times! We speak a different language so to speak!
If they are not listing to us then the reality is as the communicator it is our responsibility to know how to communicate with our "better" half in order for them to completely understand what we are saying. Therefore actually listen to us!
So what then?
Now that you know you don't speak the same language. Where do you begin to learn?
I started reading this book called "Rewire Your Brian" and he explains how Men and Woman's brains are actually wired differently. It then made sense when I was doing an online seminar with
Train Your Brain with Dana Wild. She also explained how there are over 90,000 thoughts going through our head daily. There is a part of our brain that "filters" so many of these thoughts. Could you imagine what our life would be like if we actually obtained all of our daily thoughts? Anyways I digress. I came to the conclusion that our brains filter out any communication from our partner we don't think we need! Therefore it's as if it goes in one ear and out the other! If they do not believe in the same things we are trying to communicate then they will not retain it!
Woman will usually over explain themselves. Men need point form information. You can not assume that they know what you are talking about. You can not assume that they can read the writing on the wall or the underlying meaning you are trying not to point blank state!
Woman --- Lesson One. Learn to say it mater of fact like! Do not take the round about way to explain or communicate! Just say it!
Men --- Lesson One. Learn to communicate! Explain what you need more. In a sense you need to say what you need to say and add reasons and examples to it! Woman always need more information. We need more to process and understand!
So ladies. When you come home from a bad day at work and you need to vent then you must state:
Hunny, I had a shitty day and I need ....
Men. When you come home after a crappy day and want to be left alone you must state:
Hunny, my day was shit. All I need to get over my day is an hour of TV so we can then have a lovely evening together. Nothing major happened. It was just an overall bad day!
In the end both need to take responsibility! However we must accept that we as the communicator must know who we are communicating too!
